


I don't know how to talk to you

by Evitia



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, F/M, Female Marco, jeanmarco
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-13
Updated: 2014-04-13
Packaged: 2018-01-17 03:20:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1371994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evitia/pseuds/Evitia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marceline is shy girl that transferred to new school, where she meets cool guy named Jean, who changes her life completely.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I don't know how to talk to you

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone :) There are loads of Jeanmarco fanfics so I don't know if something like that had been made before. Enough talking, enjoy :)  
> P.S.: Sorry Thomas...

For about four months I was struggling with problems of girl who transferred to new school. I missed my friends from Jinae and I painfully missed my boyfriend Thomas. Only friend I had among my new classmates was short boy with light blonde hair that was reaching his chin, his name was Armin. He was enough for me because he was studious as I was and he was helping me with catching up. It didn't bothered me much that others weren't showing much interested in me, at least they didn't pretend to.   


I'm down... No maths is not of my best subjects, I prefer history and literature. What the hell am I supposed to do with that equation? No I truly don't know what to do with this logarithm. Oh god someone help me please.

"That's enough Jean you will never sit with Eren again, sit to miss Bodt ." teachers voice broke me from my despair. Yes, she didn't like me because I'm not good at her subject and yes I'm the only one who that hag calls by surname. I watched guy with two toned hair picking up his bag and throwing himself on chair next to me.

"So you are the new one. You are Mary?" I looked into his yellowish green eyes, I felt my cheeks getting hot so I bowed my head to my work.   


"N...no I'm Marceline" I've seen him ruffling his hair in corner of my eye and made myself concentrate on maths again.

"Looks like you don't understand maths" I instinctively covered scratches in my notebook with my hand and I knew I was blushing. "Want some help, Freckles?" in his voice wasn't the usual arrogance I used to hear when he normally talked at class or tried to flirt with Mikasa.

"N...no thanks Armin will help me." Armin really tried to explain that to me but however hard I tried I didn't understand a word of his explanations.

"If you made up your mind let me know and at least I can explain you that one" he bent over to my notebook and started to write how I was supposed to do it and whispered me reasons for another steps. To my surprise I understood it.

"Thanks" I said more to my notebook than to him.

"You're welcome" he smiled at me and searched for something in his bag.   


"Do you want?" he outstretched his arm to passed me sacks of the strongest Fisherman's friend drops, my  favourite. I nodded taking one, I soon discovered that he always have something in his mouth drops, chewing gum or pencil.

The truth was I really enjoyed those maths lessons, the only thing was that I started to think that I maybe have a crush on him. I keep telling myself that is impossible because I have my Thomas. But I admired him whatever he was doing; playing with piercing in his left eyebrow, making bubbles from his gum, explaining me maths,... And if doesn't mean I've got crush on him, what does?   


"What are you reading Freckles?" I jumped when Jean suddenly spoke to me, causing me to drop my book. He bent down to hand me back my old _thousand-times-rereaded_ 'Les  Miserables' . For a moment I was able to see Iron Maiden t-shirt under his shirt.   


"I was never able to read books like this. Do you like it?" he put my book into my lap, I bushed the cover, it was still warm from his fingers.

"It's my favourite. Nice t-shirt by the way." he looked down and his brows furrowed.

"Do you listen to them?" His voice sound of disbelief, I was glad I surprised him.

"Yeah" I smiled and buried my nose to my book again, because I was afraid of looking at him for too long. 

Weeks passed and my maths skills were, thanks to Jean, becoming better, but they were still horrible. Nothing seemed bad that time, but it was just quiet before storm that changed my life completely.

Mina called me one Thursday evening telling me that Thomas was cheating on me. I was crying my eyes out whole night. When I looked to mirror next morning there were dark circles under my eyes and I looked like I was falling apart, what was not far from the truth. I picked up clothes that suited my mood old jeans and shirt that once belonged to my brother, so it made me look lost, fragile and weak.

I found it hard to pay attention at school that day.   


"What's up Freckles? You look like you need a guy to cheer you up tonight" Jean elbowed me lightly. His playful expression changed dramatically when he saw tears pouring down from my eyes wetting my glasses. As the bell rang he gripped me by my arm and led me to cafeteria, he picked up some food for both of us and found a table for us.

"What happened?" he held my hand giving me reassuring smile.

"Thomas... Was cheating... on me" I managed to get from myself thru sobs. "What am I doing wrong, Jean? Is that because I haven't slept with him?" I sounded hysterical.

"He was cheating on you and you are asking what have you done wrong?" it was hard for him to calm his anger. "No-one's that nice person to think it's their fault someone is cheating on them."   


A while we sat in silence I took bite of my sandwich, it tasted like ash to me.

"Thanks god I didn't put on my mascara today. I would look like panda by now." I made laughing sound that was not funny at all.

"Marcee you are hopeless case you know?" Jean was drying my face with Kleenex, my heart was rushing and my cheeks burning under his touch.

"You know he will be coming over this weekend?" I put my head on the table. I had one great desire, to muffle myself into blanket and just disappear.

"Whatever is happening I will be by your side." I felt his hand ruffling my hair, I put my head up and looked at him. His expression was passionate and caring.

"No Jean you are such a nice person and I simply can't ask you for anything." my voice was broken. I continued as he opened his mouth "Listen to me. I have to do it myself, it's my fight. And I.. I think... I shouldn't have told you this. Sorry for... Everything" I picked up my bag and hurried to bathroom.

I washed my face in rushing water. I straitened my back and faced mirror above me. I looked like vampire, there were dark nearly _bruise-like_ circles under my eyes and I was even paler than usual, so my freckles were even more visible. There were no more lessons that day, thanks god. I needed to sleep and at all be alone. When I finally found a courage to leave the bathroom I half expected Jean will be standing somewhere nearby, but he was not there. Yeah there was no reason for him to be there. He didn't have to care about me I'm just a stupid girl to him. No, there was not possible way he could like me.

I don't even remember how I got to my house and fainted on my bed. When I woke up it was dark. I grabbed my phone to check the time, half past twelve, and I had some messages from... Jean?   


  * SrryEren fckin Jaeger dragged me from u :/

  * Dn't be sad he was dick

  * Freckles you alive?

  * If u dn'trply within 10 min Im comin 4 u




When I was typing my reply my phone rang, it was Jean.

"Sorry I had been sleeping" my voice was husky.   


"Thanks god" he sounded relieved. "You feeling better?"

"A little. I think I will kick his ass tomorrow." I muttered into pillow.

We talked for about an hour, I kept imagining Jean all the time his smile, his body, his piercings. I was sad, Thomas was not bothering me that much, I just wanted Jean to like me but that was impossible. He likes Mikasa, there is no way he just possibly can like me. I fell asleep again hugging my pillow and thinking about him.

I even made myself take a shower and comb my hair but still I didn't dare to put on my mascara. I tried to eat some cookies but my attempt ended vomiting after two bites, so I just had coffee with ton of sugar. I curled on sofa with my book for few hours waiting for time I had to go to station to see Thomas.

I was trembling, his train was arriving in 5 minutes, 4 minutes, 2 minutes, minute. Oh god it's here. I can see him getting off, my confidence was lost.

"Hi my sweetie" he was standing in front of me his arms outreached as he was waiting for me to ran into his arms. I haven't done so, he frowned.

"You... you..." tears were filling my eyes. "why?" I breathed.   


"The question should be how, just how you could have done something like this to her? You motherfucker," I turned my head to that voice, Jean was standing there, his position and expression were reflecting his rage.   


"I can see that she did the same, not much different from how I am, are you?" Thomas's words were venom and he looked like impersonate evil to me, was it always like that and I just refused to see it?   


I've seen Jeans fist hitting my ex's face in slow motion, I heard myself calling Jean's name from a distance. Punches, kicks, strange flashes crossing my sight made it all look like comics or action movie.

"Your train leaves in a hour an a half. Never come back you damn bastard" I noticed blood pouring from Thomas's nose, he also got a black eye and Jean's cheek was promising huge bruise.   


Jean turned to me grabbed my forearm and dragged me away, soon we turned out in part of town I've never been into. My knees suddenly gave a way.

"Are you able to climb on my back?" Jean was kneeling next to me.

"No I can walk by myself that's okay" I tried to protest.

"You obviously can't. C'mon" he helped me to his back.

"Thanks god is not so far...You are hella heavy" if I wasn't fainting I would have normally asked where are we going. But It was obvious that we are heading to his house.  I haven't god even strength to complain any further.

When we approached his house he seated me on stairs while unlocking the door. He picked me up again and carried me like bride. I was still blushing hard when Jean put me on a coach and disappeared somewhere in house.

He brought glass of coke and bar of chocolate.

"You have syndromes of  hypoglycemia " hypo...what? I had no idea what was he talking about "You need sugar so eat it and drink it. When have you ate for the last time?"

"Um... Let me think..." I realized in shock" That sandwich we had tomorrow..."   


"Idiot" Jean threw pitiful look at me and stroked my cheek with his thumb. I drunk the coke with one gulp but pushed that chocolate aside.

"If you are not going to eat by yourself, I'll force you to" he has been already breaking the bar. He took a piece between his fingers "Well?" I forced my mouth open and swallowed that piece. We continued like that until there was no chocolate left, if Jean noticed I was blushing he didn't say anything. 

"Pity we can't see them." my voice sounded much better so was I feeling.   


"What?" He just stared at me.   


"Dementors," I laughed" you know that chocolate."   


"You nerd" Jean gave me one of his cute smiles.   


"By the way how have you known when is his train arriving?" I was dying to know the answer.   


"I just looked at schedules and there were three trains from your town so I eliminated those in early morning and late evening hours" he just shrunk and suddenly got to his feet.   


"It sounds kinda creepy, makes you look like a stalker" I was watching him going to the other side of room. His hand found pack of cigarettes on shelf and pulled one out, there were something weird on his movements, I realized they were automatic. His hands were searching for lighter in his pockets. He suddenly froze, his brows furrowed as he realized what he was doing. He took the cigarette into his long fingers and looked at it in way that made hair on my neck stand. That cigarette broke in half, Jean threw it into bin with disgusted grimace.  "Sorry old habit. I gave up but stress brings it back" it explained that he always had something in his mouth. He came back to me and pushed me into his lap stroking my hair. "One thing you need to know," he was nearly whispering now "I don't let anyone to mess up with object of my affection.

"Object of your affection?" I looked up into his eyes "I always thought it's Mikasa."

"Mikasa?" amused smile curved his lips "No, that used to be like two years ago. Now I'm pretending this just to piss off Eren." he took a deep breath and stroked my cheekbone, "You were my number one the moment you appeared in our class. I just.. um didn't know how to talk to you" slight blush coloured his cheeks, god I swear I've never seen such cute thing in my life.

"Tell me" he broke our quiet happiness "Are you blushing all the time or it's just in my presence?"

"You are special, I guess" 

"I knew it" he said with self-satisfaction that reflected in his smile. "Can you sit for while?" I did so but I haven't got a clue why. Jean just lied down on the couch, pulling me to himself. He tangled his legs with mine. I listened to his quickened heartbeat with my ear pressed to his chest. I let my fingers probe muscles on his stomach. I didn't even know we fell asleep like that.

We were woken by crack of front door, moments later women in her forty's with tight bun in elegant black dress entered the room. We both got to our feet quickly.

"Hi mum" said Jean "this is my girlfriend Marceline" I opened my mouth to complain but he gestured me to keep quiet and smiled.

"Nice to meet you" she shook my hand. Her eyes were similar to Jean's but much much colder, I felt like she could see even my underwear. Yay I ruined all chances to getting on well with his mother right the first time she had seen me.

"She is staying for dinner." Jean threw casually in his mum's direction grabbing my hand, "Let's go to my room" we were silent all the way there.

"Interesting way to introduce myself to your mum" I rested my body on his fatboy.

"She found lots of girls in more shameful situations than that." he was turned with his back to me staring from window "and if you think she have been x-raying you that is just because you are the first one I've ever called my girlfriend."

"And about that girlfriend, don't you think you should have asked me first?" he made his way to me.

"I thought it was... um like we agreed without saying it out loud" he bend down and whispered to my ear "but if you want it to be official I'll take you somewhere tomorrow and ask you properly."

"Why tomorrow?" blood rushing thru my veins and flushing my cheeks.

"Because I don't have roses now" his annoyed tone made me laugh. I was giggling until he pressed his forehead to mine, than my breath had stopped completely and my heart gone mad. He was kneeling in font of me his hands on both sides of my hips. He brushed my lips gently with his, they were so warm expect that little ring on his lower lip. I always wondered how would it feel to kiss him. I wanted just one thing to k iss him more and more. I kissed him back less innocently, but suddenly it still was not enough, I needed him closer. My hands pulled him closer to my embrace. He nibbed my lower lip and kissed his way to my neck. I felt like there is something, something bigger than us for first time in my life I believed there is something like fate. That moment I knew our souls are bound together and even death haven't got enough power to part us.

I whispered into his hair: "I know we will always find each other."

"I told you before, I'll always be by your side, always" Jean whispered back.


End file.
